I'm a terrible person

I'm a terrible person, cause Ive made up my mind.
Im disastrous and I hurt people by being like that, Im really not constant and I change my mind easily...Its not just that I change my mind but that I dont think things well before I operate and that's when I get in trouble.
Sometimes I just wanna go back in time and have the problems I had then, cause somehow they were so much easier to solve than the ones I have now. Why can't it ever be a bit easier? It's really annoying.
All I wanna do is get away from here as soon as I can, to a place far away, alone. Think for myself and make up my mind for once, cause I don't wanna hurt and I dont want people to hurt because of me. I'm complicated and that's why I think very few people get me, if anyone does at all...And to be honest, I dont think anyone fully gets this level of simple complexity (ironic too much?). I'm learning so much about myself and understanding me better everyday. Finally.
It was about time. This is a journey I can only take by myself and it's scary but it needs to be done, cause there so many things I have to prepare myself for before I get out there alone.
But for now, all I know is, that I'm a terrible person and there are a lot of things I don't deserve and I still get them.